Picture of the Week

Picture of the Week
Anamorphic snowman

Friday, May 25, 2007

The Nevada Sagebrush vs. The Courier-Journal: A comparative analysis

Deadline at The Nevada Sagebrush is at 12:30am, this is us at about 12:15am:

"AAAAH! Where the hell is that page?"
"I don't know the link is there, who has it open?"
A shoe flies across the room and knocks out a copy editor
"Man down!"
"WHO HAS THAT DAMNED PAGE OPEN!"
Clint walks in
"You mean A1?"
"Yes, only the least important page of the century"
"I think I have it open"
"Nick, please kill your assistant"
"Gladly"
The two walk outside and a blood-curdling scream is heard
"Mike, why the hell is this page taking so long to EPS?"
"Oh yah, I forgot to compress the art. How long is taking"
"Forty-five minutes"
"I'll look into giving a crap sometime tomorrow afternoon. Thanks."
"Douche."
Garrett starts hammering something else into the wall for the third time this year


The metro/news deadline at The Courier-Journal is 11:45pm, this is them at about 11:30pm:

"Today has been kind of hectic."
"Yes, yes it has. Could you pass me another spot of sweet tea?"
"Oh yes, gladly. By the way, how are the chillens?"
"Oh quite right. Butch got an A on his spelling test and Cassidy is trying out for cheerleading tomorrow. She's got this great one, two, kick routine she's been working on - it's a sure-fire winner."
"Splendid. Oh look at that, my pages are ready to send out. Let me triple check them - heh, heh, can never be too careful."
"Did you remember to change the date?"
"Of course, I did that several hours ago silly. Well it's all good, I'm sending it to the printers."
"What a close call"
"Yes, yes indeed"


The Nevada Sagebrush at 12:30am:

"Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit! Someone call the printers and tell them we're going to be late again"
"Damnit, stop paying them over time"
"I blame news"
"Screw you, it's sports' fault"
"Sports never makes mistakes"
"What about that story you forgot to jump"
"You know what..."
A brawl between sports and news breaks out
"WE HAVE LESS THAN ONE MINUTE TO PUT OUT THIS PAPER AND THERE ARE FOUR PAGES LEFT, WAIT UNTIL WE'RE DONE BEFORE YOU KILL EACH OTHER!"
A gardening fork falls out of the ceiling and hits Clint in the head, knocking him unconcious
"Well that's one less problem to worry about"
"Yah, skeevy hippie"


The Courier-Journal at 11:45pm:

"Same place same time tomorrow?"
"Yep."
"Night everyone"


The Nevada Sagebrush at 12:45am
"THE SERVER CRASHED! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"
The world implodes


So today was good, I got to design half a page. Everyone says I'm learning quickly so I'm excited about having my own section next week. I made new friends and swapped some stories and stopped being so mumbly and asocial. So yay! Excitement all around.

But I'm tired and ready for bed. It's going to be a great summer. :)

2 comments:

jessica said...

Hahahahahahaha.

Ah, production night.

Virginia Faith said...

Why is it Clint who always gets killed/hurt? Leave my Clint alone!